If you distance the distant, you will end up distancing the close

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If you distance the distant, you will end up distancing the close

If you distance the distant, you will end up distancing the close

If you cause those already distant from you to keep their distance, in the end even those close to you will drift away. A proverb against a harsh, unfriendly, or strict approach that pushes away those who are distant and ultimately drives away those who are close.

("When the Gibeonites said (Joshua 10): 'Come up to us quickly and save us, help us,' at that moment Joshua said: 'Shall we trouble the community for these strangers?' God said to him: 'Joshua, if you distance the distant, you will end up distancing the close.' - Bamidbar Rabbah (Vilna), Parashat Naso, Section 8)

Translation

Expression (Hebrew)

אִם תַּרְחִיק אֶת הָרְחוֹקִים סוֹפְךָ לְרַחֵק אֶת הַקְּרוֹבִים

Definition (Hebrew)

אִם תִּגְרֹם לַאֲנָשִׁים הָרְחוֹקִים מִמְּךָ לְהַמְשִׁיךְ לְהִתְרַחֵק, הֲרֵי שֶׁבְּסוֹפוֹ שֶׁל דָּבָר גַּם הַקְּרוֹבִים לְךָ יִתְרַחֲקוּ מִמְּךָ. פִּתְגָּם נֶגֶד גִּישָׁה נֻקְשָׁה, לֹא יְדִידוּתִית אוֹ מַחְמִירָה הַגּוֹרֶמֶת לָרְחוֹקִים שֶׁלֹּא לִרְצוֹת לְהִתְקָרֵב, וְלִקְרוֹבִים לִגְרֹם לִרְצוֹת לְהִתְרַחֵק.

("שֶׁבְּשָׁעָה שֶׁאָמְרוּ הַגִּבְעוֹנִים (יְהוֹשֻׁעַ י): עָלָה אֵלֵינוּ מְהֵרָה וְהוֹשִׁיעָה לָנוּ וְעֶזְרֵנוּ- בְּאוֹתָהּ שָׁעָה אָמַר יְהוֹשֻׁעַ: וְכִי בִּשְׁבִיל הַגֵּרִים הַלָּלוּ אָנוּ מטריחים עַל הַצִּבּוּר. אָמַר לוֹ הקב"ה: יְהוֹשֻׁעַ, אִם תַּרְחִיק אֶת הָרְחוֹקִים סוֹפְךָ לְרַחֵק אֶת הַקְּרוֹבִים"- בַּמִּדְבָּר רַבָּה (וִילְנָא) פָּרָשַׁת נָשָׂא פָּרָשָׁה ח)

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